The Astrologer ★★★★

“If he wakes up, it won’t work.”

Rides its spectrum from lysergic to laughably inept to distinctly terrifying with impressive fluidity, punctuating the trip with unexpected twists (the last one with more freckles than I would’ve guessed) and, disappointingly, protracted passages of real atrocity footage. I don’t know the first thing about James Glickenhaus, but it takes a special talent to turn something this fun and compellingly odd into a massive downer for the sake a few mutilated-corpse and injured-kid shots.

So while I generally enjoyed the po-faced loopiness of the movie, I can only recommend it to people with strong stomachs, degraded shock responses, and/or quick enough reflexes to hand-block portions of the screen for minutes at a time. Preferably all of the above.

Watched on Tubi.

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