Jeffrey Long

Jeffrey Long

I’m a lover of low budget cheesy Direct-To-Video/VOD B-Movies and I make no apologies for that.

Favorite films

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Recent reviews

  • Benny Loves You

    Benny Loves You



    Benny Loves You is a British dark horror comedy about a man’s childhood toy coming alive and killing the people in his life.

    The first scene had me pretty worried about this one, but it ended up on a very satisfying note that made me realize this movie was not pulling any punches and was going to be fun as hell, and fun as hell is exactly what I got. Sure, the acting is pretty bad and not all…

  • The Woman in the Window

    The Woman in the Window



    It was great for about 75% of the runtime and then really bad for the last 25%, which really hurt it. Also, when all was said and done I found it super predictable, which isn’t good when the entire thing is built around a mystery that you can accurately call from the very beginning.

    *Watched on Netflix.

Popular reviews

  • Deep Blue Sea 3

    Deep Blue Sea 3


    Being such the fan that I am of Direct-to-Video sequels, and of Deep Blue Sea, you could easily make the assumption that Deep Blue Sea 3 was one of my most anticipated VOD releases of this entire year (second only to Tremors 7 later this year). While I thought the second was an 'ok' entry (also see: essentially lower budget remake), this one was pretty good.

    This one is a direct sequel to the second movie, following the escaped…

  • The Rake

    The Rake


    This is my updated score. After being attacked and hounded on social media by people involved in the movie, based off my review of it (which still had quite a bit of positivity toward the movie in it, but apparently that wasn't good enough, they want people salivating over this and giving it 10/10 scores), I decided to rescind my review and go with a much lower score due to how those involved treated me. Hey low budget filmmakers,…