• The Departed

    The Departed

    ★★★★★

    this movie is a comedy about irish americans yelling funny words and shooting each other and the cut to the rat at the end is perfect. i refuse to believe scorsese intended this film to be the serious drama people perceive it as. "maybe. maybe not. maybe fuck yahself", this is not a serious movie

  • Enemy

    Enemy

    ★★★

    neat story but villeneuve Does Not Like Women

  • Hook

    Hook

    this movie is absolutely insane. the movie is 2.5 hours (i have no idea how it didnt drag on, but it didnt. the pacing was very good) of pure chaos where things happen for absolutely no reason and some things completely dont make sense, but its fun to watch and it all works.

    other stuff:

    + set design and costumes are AMAZING.

    + rufio whips ass

    - movie is weirdly horny and theres sexual tension between robin williams and his grandmother. which i thought was bad

  • Empty Metal

    Empty Metal

    ★½

    didnt really feel like it had a message that went beyond "cops are bad". a lot of the acting was extremely bad and a lot of the script was kinda pretentious.

    it seems though that the movie does some things that are cool for people who're really into film, and im not, so maybe it just wasnt for me

  • Water Lilies

    Water Lilies

    ★★★½

    queer teenage romance is ugly, and not in a sexy, dramatic way, but in an awkward, drab, sad way. watching this movie was like being in highschool again

    3.5 stars for capturing feelings ive felt in a way that other movies havent, something sciamma has a penchant for, but it didnt really grab me otherwise.

  • Synecdoche, New York

    Synecdoche, New York

    ★★★★★

    "i know some writers who use subtext and theyre cowards"

  • Children of Men

    Children of Men

    ★★★½

    pros:
    - really fuckin cool action sequences. most reviews talk about how cool the long takes are and theyre right
    - the worldbuilding of fascist britain is really well done
    - i think the movie exercises restraint in not having the main character ever use a gun and i liked that
    - i would love to smoke strawberry cough with my BOY jasper

    cons:
    - kind of gross misrepresentation of revolutionary groups that lead to a lot of "both sides are bad, actually"
    - some incredibly corny sequences i.e. the part where they walk past the people and soldiers with the baby

  • The VelociPastor

    The VelociPastor

    ★★★★

    "i dont know much about god"
    "well i dont know much about dinosaurs

  • Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
  • A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night

    A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night

    ★★★★

    sure fuck it whatever

    amazing cat

  • Carol

    Carol

    ★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    really did not feel like the romance in this movie was earned at all. neither carol or therese's characters evoked much in me, and i didnt see or feel the alleged incredible emotions people are gushing about. i really just spent most of the movie hating harge and richard

    i was so mad at the end. i was happy (and with how the rest of the relationship played out, surprised) when therese turned carol down in the penultimate scene and…

  • Knives Out

    Knives Out

    ★★★★

    and i sez to him..... moidah.... its like a donut

    great movie. felt like a play, which is something i really like. daniel craig was very funny.