Riley Gardner

Riley Gardner


Patiently waiting for Jamie Bell to step on my face. Favorites change around. Mostly here for the gay stuff.

Favorite films

Recent activity


Recent reviews

  • Dark Shadows

    Dark Shadows


    a baked potato is funnier than this

  • Here Are the Young Men

    Here Are the Young Men


    Great example of a film believing itself to be philosophically rich while being emotionally bankrupt. The central theme of individualism run amok is merely a plaything to get to the flashy stuff our director finds appealing, thus bringing together an hour and a half of nothingness.

    Of the few notes of merit, it's impressive the performances come off so well when there's hardly any motivating factor scene-by-scene or line-by-line.

    Please, filmmakers: try and believe in the themes you're showcasing. When you don't, it's far more obvious than you'd think.

Popular reviews

  • Cats



    yes YES I loved it. Ya'll are all fucking wussies who can't handle a two hour cat joke? GTFO, all of you.

    In all seriousness, a 1.7 on Letterboxd?! Poor Tom Hooper never had a chance. CATS was memed before it could breathe and so people feel obligated to give it a 1/2 star, 1 star, call it appalling while GIVING 120 DAYS OF SODOM FIVE??!? Fuck you all. Pretentious dick wads.

    Since when did horny cats become a turn…

  • Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom

    Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom

    There were about twenty or so seconds of this movie I enjoyed.