• Enemy

    Enemy

    ★★★★★

    After rewatching and falling out of love with Blade Runner 2049 and seeing Dune for the first time and finding it utterly lifeless and boring, I began to think back to this film.
    I hadn't seen it for about two or three years but I remembered it being my favourite Denis Villeneuve film, but the one-two punch of BR2049 and Dune made me terrified to revisit this film because I didn't want to end up hating it.
    But that fear…

  • Prisoners of the Ghostland

    Prisoners of the Ghostland

    This film has four distinct modes:
    Boring, Obnoxious, Meh and Fucking Awful.

    P.s. One star for Sofia Boutella and half a star for a few fun Nic Cage moments.

  • The Machinist

    The Machinist

    ★★★★★

    What happens in this film might not be that original or unique, you could even call it cliché and formulaic.
    But what makes this film work isn't what happens but how it happens and how it makes you feel.
    And my god did it make me feel like shit in the best way possible.
    I got so incredibly involved in the films intoxicatingly sad and maddening atmosphere that once it ended I just sat there looking at the screen feeling…

  • Blade Runner

    Blade Runner

    Blade Runner is a film that has slowly grown on me with each viewing.
    The first time I saw it (back in 2016) I absolutely hated it, I am now on my sixth viewing and I think I might finally be on the verge of falling in love with it.
    What stood out to me the most on this viewing were all the small details that had lingered in my mind since the last time I saw it.
    The silhouette…

  • The World Is Not Enough

    The World Is Not Enough

    As far as I'm concerned, this is the peak of the Brosnan era.
    I'm not a big fan of GoldenEye, Tomorrow Never Dies is an alright time waster and Die Another Day is a glorious piece of rubbish that I absolutely adore.
    But this is the only Brosnan Bond outing that feels like a genuine Bond film and not like a 90's/00's action film that just happens to include James Bond.
    I have always really liked this film and think…

  • Malignant

    Malignant

    ★★★★★

    James Wan is really hit and miss for me.
    I like Saw, Dead Silence, Death Sentence, The Conjuring 2 and Furious 7 but highly disliked The Conjuring, Aquaman, Insidious and Insidious: Chapter 2.
    So I wasn't sure whether I should see or sleep on Malignant but my curiosity got the better of me once I started hearing about how insane it supposedly was.
    And I couldn't be happier that I decided to give it a shot because this is the…

  • It

    It

    This film is so fucking aggressive in its attempts to scare you that it ends up sabotaging any amount of atmosphere that it could have had and instead ends up being a weirdly boring and repetitive dysfunctional mess of laughably unscary jump scares and obnoxious "CrEePy" imagery.
    The scenes with Bev's dad are easily the best and the worst scenes in the film, best because they are the only genuinely freightening scenes and worst because of the film's gross mishandling…

  • Dune

    Dune

    If I wanted to I could write a long rant about why I didn't like Dune: Part One but honestly the film just made me so fucking tired that I had lost all interest in talking about it less than half way through the screening.
    I had literally started planning what to do with my evening while the last act was still happening in front of my eyes.
    In short, it's obvious that Denis loves the source material but his…

  • Blade Runner 2049

    Blade Runner 2049

    Blade Runner 2049 was the second film that I saw three times at the cinema, the first being Suicide Squad, yet this is the first time since 2017 that I've felt like revisiting it.
    At the time I remember absolutely loving it and thinking it was a deeply profound masterwork, but on this watch I was surprised by how emotionally shallow the whole experience was.
    I still love K's/Joe's character arc of accepting his own mediocrity and I like all…

  • You Only Live Twice

    You Only Live Twice

    James Bond stops Space Heists by being racist in Japan.

  • The Last Exploits of the Olsen Gang

    The Last Exploits of the Olsen Gang

    For the first hour or so I thought I was watching an Olsen-Banden film I hadn't seen but then Egon turned into Lille Egon and was kidnapped and then I suddenly remembered that I had in fact seen this one.
    Or at least the ending, as I have no memory of seeing anything before that before.
    Overall a pretty damn good film with some amazing highlights, the weirdly Tenet-esque heist with the bridge, the Lille Egon sequence and basically the whole climax to be honest.
    But I couldn't be happier that this wasn't the last one.

  • The Olsen Gang Runs Amok

    The Olsen Gang Runs Amok

    ★★★★

    This is one of the Olsen-Banden films that I hadn't seen and I am genuinely surprised I hadn't seen it as it's probably the best Olsen-Banden film so far.
    Tightly paced, genuinely engaging, weirdly tense, pretty damn funny and a great inventive Heist.
    It's the first time since the first film where Erik Balling & Co have made a film that actually fully works from beginning to end.
    I really hope that this is where they finally cracked the code to the Olsen-Banden formula and that from now on there will be nothing but hilarious greatness.