Mark Asch

I could never take the place of your man.

Favorite films

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Recent reviews

  • The Woman in the Window

    The Woman in the Window


    “My son is fifteen and a half years old!” -Gary Oldman

    Not going to call this “Brian De Palma’s PANIC ROOM” or anything crazy like that but Joe Wright is the right kind of hack for this material—his perfume-ad flourishes make the already stilted thriller logic seem almost Brechtian, while still unintentionally choppy as hell. Amy Adams has a body in the trunk and a brick on the gas from the word Go, this is like 400% of the FDA’s Recommended Daily Allowance of Amy Adams.

  • Secret Honor

    Secret Honor


    an audio monologue positing a paranoid, corrupt, reviled President as a camp psychodrama with easily imitated speech patterns who Makes Some Good Points about the forgotten working class, the Deep State, Bohemian Grove, China, the American war machine, Kissinger and Jews. So, the platonic ideal of a Dirtbag Left podcast. I don’t know if anyone has yet pointed out that this movie starts the same way as an episode of Mr Rogers’s Neighborhood.

Popular reviews

  • The Comfort of Strangers

    The Comfort of Strangers


    as with all top-tier Schrader, if you told me this movie was directed by a virgin, i would believe you

  • Bloody Nose, Empty Pockets

    Bloody Nose, Empty Pockets


    Derek Jarman’s WILL YOU DANCE WITH ME? for ugly straight people: a behaviorist experiment via a staged fly-on-the-wall documentary, this time about the kind of bar where there are probably literal flies on the wall.

    Jarman’s film, for which he built a gay club in early-80s London, gains unspeakable poignancy in hindsight for the looming AIDS plague; the Ross Bros couldn’t know they were making this on the cusp of another pandemic that would similarly wipe out spaces like the…