Tenet ★★½

Nolan conceptualising the plot: “But if I keep the twiddle and get rid of the twaddle, I might be able to debefuddle the quantacular findiculum”.

Tenet had my brain screaming for a lobotomy. It’s a shame because I genuinely looked forward to this one; it was meant to be cinema’s saving grace; instead, it was a literal clusterfuck inside a shit-show while on a train-wreck. I felt an emptiness after viewing. An overwhelming sense of feeling underwhelmed.

All in all, I was relieved it was over. Nolan’s latest offering, for me, fell flat, and that thumping, ear-splintering bass was like a specialised alarm designed to wake me up from this snooze-fest of a flick.

Harsh words aside, I have to say, Pattison was rather delicious in this. Robsessed with the little green scarf he wore, and Washington did what he could with a meh script. While I appreciate Nolan as a director, and I’ve enjoyed his films in the past, Tenet was ultimately a film with a whole lot of style and very little substance. I watched sexy men in perfectly tailored suits time-hop for 2 hours. If I wanted to watch a sexy cast do sexy things in a backasswards setting, I’d happily watch ‘The Matrix’ for the gazillionth time.

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