G has written 40 reviews for films rated ★★½ .

  • Conan the Destroyer

    Conan the Destroyer

    ★★½

    Mate of mine got wind I was watching it. Just as told him about Conan getting gob’d on (Face, neck and chest) by a vengeful camel.

    His reply on recalling the ending:

    ‘The ending has a Wizard with an etch-a-sketch‘

    This didn’t happen. Still mental. It wasn’t half bad. The cast is mad. Sarah Douglas, Philly’s favorite son Wilt Chamberlain. Tracy Walter’s character straight from Repo Man. Just propped in. Even Grace Jones is great in this. Mad how Sven-Ole Thorsen…

  • Zack Snyder's Justice League

    Zack Snyder's Justice League

    ★★½

    Not sure why I did this…


    On the edges there’s some intriguing stuff. Amazon and the mother-box reverse Alamo at the start is quite possibly Snyder’s greatest scene and that’s the first 30mins. There are moments. Even the final act had some pace to it. Steppenwolf getting juggled by three of them. It’s an improvement on B v S, at least these characters are likable. Cyborg looks visually jarring, but both him and Flash come off more interesting then the…

  • Street Fighter

    Street Fighter

    ★★½

    Cuts to underground kick boxing tournament. DJ turntable scratch: ᴡɪᴄᴋᴛʏ ᴡɪᴄᴋᴛʏ ᴡᴀʜ ꜱᴛʀᴇᴇᴛꜰɪɢʜᴛʀ!!

  • Alien: Covenant

    Alien: Covenant

    ★★½

    Never actually watched the promo stuff for this back in 2017. Didnt want to trip into any spoilers. There was few bridge short films that join the dots between Prometheus & flesh out of the Covenant crew. Still think the film is lil’ flat outside of the David/Dr Frankenstein idea

  • Tenet

    Tenet

    ★★½

    eèéêëērrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Tory Espionage Action. Tax Haven Bond Villain with Darkroom Rotary Door.

    OPN should sue. It’s like someone is playing Garden of Delete too fkn loud, so you can’t hear people talk on the telly. It doesn’t work. When you think it’s gonna pull it off. It throws more inverted bodies at you in tactical gear.

  • John Wick: Chapter 2

    John Wick: Chapter 2

    ★★½

    All club music in John Wick movies has to sound like  it was made by somebody who hasn’t stepped foot in a club in 15 years.

  • Joker

    Joker

    ★★½

    Film that is pretending to be another film.. a better film. It’s all going in 3rd gear. Not quite where it needs to be. 
    Your film is pointing a finger at the Hollywood model that’s funding it... as your bad guys... and you buckle. Even Dark Knight Rises resembled the French Revolution when things started burning... Wayne as villain is why I’m here. Don’t won’t to take anything away from that performance, but with a better director. Chaplin theatre scene was…

  • Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones

    Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones

    ★★½

    One step forward... Two steps back. 

    It’s bookended by energy, but the bit in the middle is a unsolvable slog, that makes a trade dispute even more passable in a kids movie... I think it was written backwards from a great set piece. Mother Skywalker still hits the right spot. Dialogue delivery is better... I think. Or it’s pretending to be better. You left people with the image of Anakin’s promise to comeback a free all the slaves and you…

  • Clear and Present Danger

    Clear and Present Danger

    ★★½

    Clear and Present Clancy..


    Tommy boy got his way. What a flat, plot driven characterless 130mins. The beige IBM PC & serial printer combo action sequence... yer man still didn’t get that feed tray closed. 3 minutes of CIA desk jockeys punching DELETE & PRI SCR

    We are world away from Hunt for Red October.

  • A Sky Full of Stars for a Roof

    A Sky Full of Stars for a Roof

    ★★½

    Petroni basically liked A Few Dollars More style revenge. 2nd western after Death Rides a Horse follows a similar basic structure. But this is a buddy western, first for Italian Westerns, a good 12 months before Butch Cassidy.

    Genuine funny partnership between Giuliano Gemma (Billy) and Mario Adorf (Harry) as they travel around the west swindling town folk, outlaws pursuing them and even each other. The telegram outpost scam being a highlight, specially when some town folk tripping around outback…

  • Star Trek: The Motion Picture

    Star Trek: The Motion Picture

    ★★½

    A great matte painting movie where you can tell it’s a great big painting because somebody didn’t light it very well... but it doesn’t matter. ‘Let’s take two flyby passes of the enterprise in dry dock, we spent all this time on the model. Actually make it three!’

  • Run, Man, Run

    Run, Man, Run

    ★★½

    Possibly bit of anticlimax after Sollima's first two films in his political spaghetti trilogy. Face to Face the middle film is the odd one out here. This works as what Manuel "Cuchillo" Sanchez, did next.. a Big Gundown sequel and a twilight Zapata Western.

    Taking it's name from the Big Gundown theme song 'Run Man Run!'. Here the theme is sung by Millian himself. This really does feel like a vehicle for Millian's Cuchillo. His scenes are the best part.…