The Happening

The Happening

18/100

What was that? Seriously, what in the flying frap did I just watch? This film makes me want to punch Mark Wahlberg right in his stupid face, because I know for a fact he can do so much better. He was just absolutely terrible, whether he achieved this on his own or because of Shyamalan's direction is an entirely different question. Wahlberg can be a hit or miss, and he went way off course in this one.

Was this supposed to be a comedy? I found myself laughing at almost all of the deaths, especially when John Leguizamo walked out of a totaled car wreck without a single scratch. I can understand surviving because he wore a seat belt, but there's no way he would've gotten out of that car that quickly right after a head on collision. Also news flash: Suicide isn't funny! So why does it look so hilarious just seeing all these bodies fall off of buildings directly towards the camera? Is it a grim and poorly thought out callback to B-movie plots? If so, it failed at capturing any of the so-called "magic" of those films. This was just so painful to watch, I could hardly bear it.

I know that Shyamalan and Wahlberg can do so much better. I've seen it in both of them. So why did this 90 minute Al Gore campaign suck so badly? Maybe because it was a 90 minute Al Gore campaign. "Ooh we need to start treating the trees better, they're all gonna kill us!" Shoddy plots like that died off back in the 50's I thought, but apparently political motivations know no bounds.

The Happening was mercifully short, and yet it just kept dragging on. It was just so boring, and the deaths were just glazed over as they happened. They were all much more funny than terrifying. Maybe Gore did have a hand in this story. It wouldn't surprise me. If you thought Lady in the Water was bad, you should definitely (or definitely not) watch this. I guarantee this is his worst film to date, although I haven't seen After Earth or The Last Airbender yet (the latter which was oh-so-uncleverly hinted at in the end of this film). Subtlety works better for Shyamalan, which is why I'm glad he's going back to his small roots. He's a lot better off there than with these greedy big studios.