• The Game

    The Game

    In real life, Michael Douglas's dad is Kirk Douglas. But in The Game (1997) his dad is "the voice of Mario" himself, Charles Martinet. Another silver screen miracle!

  • Old

    Old

    If you have even an ounce of the abhorrent  "okay so you mean to tell me" impulse when you watch movies this is like getting an MRI with a penny in your pocket. But if you're cool, it's a fun little movie about a freaky beach.

  • Mulan

    Mulan

    Watched it on a plane so I wouldn't give Disney any money. The only problem? I flew Donald Duck Air. You just can't win.

  • Swordfish

    Swordfish

    It looks like somebody was holding up orange tinted oakleys in front of the camera for every shot. It's easy to sit here in 2021 and laugh but you have to understand that people in 2001 thought that the "you wouldn't DOWNLOAD a CAR" warning on DVDs was basically the coolest thing possible and we were experiencing the end of history.

    Some truly phenomenal scenes in this thing. Loved the scene where Hugh Jackman has to hack with a gun…

  • Black Widow

    Black Widow

    I wish they would let these suck more. There’s a baseline competency to these movies that saps a lot of fun out of them. Red Dawn is the superior piece of capitalist propaganda because it feels cranky and paranoid rather than assembled by Disney’s military wing. I dunno. The MCU party lines have been drawn for years. Nobody’s on the fence. Who cares what I think about this, you already decided you either agree or disagree with me before you read this.

  • Body Double

    Body Double

    That joke about a medieval peasant being vaporized by listening to a single shoegaze riff but instead it’s a YA fiction scold being atomized by any single scene of this movie.

  • Blood Feast

    Blood Feast

    One of the best title cards there’s ever been. Could’ve easily watched Stabbo Marx kill women for an additional ten, maybe eleven minutes.

  • The Driller Killer

    The Driller Killer

    More slashers should have their killers’ motivations tied into how annoying it is to live next to a punk band.

  • F9

    F9

    I love that the Tokyo Drift guys have been doing Car Jackass for all these years. Hell yeah.

  • The Sparks Brothers

    The Sparks Brothers

    Saw it (in theaters, they’re back baby!) with my friend Joe Rumrill and he had a really good joke about Henry Rollins showing up post credits like Sweetums at the end of the Muppet Movie going “wait, wait! You forgot to interview me! Really good joke!

    I don’t have a lot more to say about this other than I generally liked it and was pleasantly surprised by how charming and funny they are. You can sort of tell which Sparks albums Edgar Wright likes the most but that’s okay. I’m going to run into a similar problem when I make the Guided By Voices documentary.

  • Bo Burnham: Inside

    Bo Burnham: Inside

    I can already tell everybody’s going to be annoying about this

  • Arrival

    Arrival

    I really like the short story it’s based on. Trying to be less negative so I’ll end it there!